What is good about matchmaking instead of dating

Views expressed do not necessarily represent the official teachings of University Bible Fellowship nor any other current or ex member of University Bible Fellowships point of view

The current dating system in the mainstream Western culture creates a lot of problems.  It makes consent vague.  People tend to touch each other with unclear boundaries and no explicit agreement stated before a community to have physical relations so that people can clearly know their physical relations were consensual.

Dating creates a vague situation that can lead to false rape accusations.  Alternatively, formally announcing marriage makes a implication before the community that people are agreeing to have physical relations with each other.

Dating also may put men and women at risk for date rape.  Yes men can be raped by women also not just the one way around.

In some cases there is no reason for men to date while going to college when some men can not be financially ready to marry until after they graduate from college and achieve a certain job status based on their college degree and work experience.  If they actually found someone before achieving this financial status they could not responsibly marry them.  Furthermore spending time dating may just delay their graduation and work promotions, preventing them from marrying the very person they found while dating or delaying their marriage to that person.  Alternatively if they found them by  dating that person after getting a high enough salary job and not before that financial status was achieved or if they were matched with that person voluntarily after getting a high enough salary job they could actually marry them earlier and in a more finacially stable situation and with better health then if they started dating too early.

Matchmaking may be used to avoid those problems with dating

Additionally matchmaking can have a screening mechanism if an entire community knew how someone behaved all their life where as in dating you might meet someone as a new person without knowing how they behaved in the past when you were not around to observe them which maybe important because some people behave better when they are with someone they are dating to make a good impression with them even though they actually behave very badly the rest of the time and may revert to their old ways after marriage or after they seduced that person or took their finances or achieved some other goal.

Matchmaking can also be abused in many ways but I am not discussing them here and if you want examples of matchmaking gone bad just do a internet search about problems with arranged marriages on your own.

I just want to say something positive about University Bible Fellowship pairing people instead of only negative things about it.  I do not believe their method would be all bad if at least one change was made that I will describe later.  

I hope University Bible Fellowship does not switch into making dating or courtship the only options when people realize about the marriage by faith fraud but allow students to date, court or have a matchmaker.

My problem with marriage by faith is not the idea to use matchmakers instead of dating but that they are not open and up front about what they are really doing.  It is dishonest and it is really marriage by fraud.

I used to support marriage by faith when I thought it was matchmaking someone to marry someone where they never dated but I realized that is not what it really is after I examed it further, however it took me years to comprehend it.

I originally did not even know marriage by faith was matchmaking and at that time I supported it also but what I was supporting was not what marriage by faith really was.

That is the problem it is an ever changing label one layer in fraud wrapped in another.

Please do not abandon matchmaking just abandon the lack of transparency and honesty about it.

The one minimum change would be to actually tell people what they are doing instead of telling people they are doing something else instead.

Since you can not necessarily tell people everything about the organization the first time you do a Bible study, you could at the very least put such information on the UBF official websites and have brochures available in the Church for anyone who wants to take one.

There could be a pamphlet entitled, "Why does UBF support matchmaking instead of dating" and another pamphlet entitled, "How does the UBF matchmaking process work"

These pamphlets should actually tell the truth about the organizations policies and not something else that is not true but is what they think people want to hear in order to come back.

What is the limit on authority for husbands or parents

Articles here do not necessarily represent official UBF teaching or any other UBF member or ex members point of view

If you are a man imagine how a woman should answer the questions in relation to her husband.

Members of UBF often teach that children should obey parents and wives should obey their husbands.  In fact I bet you are so familiar with it you could find or write down the verses that teach that yourself.  If you can not ask your Bible teacher or Pastor to remind you or do a search for it on the internet.

Write a list of these verses on one sheet of paper
 Now take a second sheet of paper and write down the following verses

13 “You shall not murder.

14 “You shall not commit adultery.

15 “You shall not steal.

16 “You shall not give false testimony against your neighbor.

Exodus 20:13-16 NIV

https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Exodus+20&version=NIV

Accessed online on 2018 January 20

Now I want you to ask yourself the following questions

1A If one of my parents tell me to murder someone should I obey the verses I just listed saying not to murder or should I obey the verses I listed saying to obey my parents when I can not obey both?

1B If my husband tells me to murder someone should I obey the verses I just listed saying not to murder or should I obey the verses I listed saying to obey my husband when I can not obey both?

2A If one of my parents tell me to commit adultery should I obey the verses I just listed saying not to murder or should I obey the verses I listed saying to obey my parents when I can not obey both?

2B If my husband tells me to commit adultery someone should I obey the verses I just listed saying not to commit adultery or should I obey the verses I listed saying to obey my husband when I can not obey both?

3A If one of my parents tell me to steal from someone should I obey the verses I just listed saying not to steal or should I obey the verses I listed saying to obey my parents when I can not obey both?

3B If my husband tells me to steal from someone should I obey the verses I just listed saying not to steal or should I obey the verses I listed saying to obey my husband when I can not obey both?

4A If one of my parents tell me to bear false witness against someone should I obey the verses I just listed saying not to bear false witness or should I obey the verses I listed saying to obey my parents when I can not obey both?

4B If my husband tells me to bear false witness against someone should I obey the verses I just listed saying not to bear false witness or should I obey the verses I listed saying to obey my husband when I can not obey both?

Now substitute any other authority figure you think the Bible teaches you to obey, such as Caesar, a police officer, judge, congressman, president, commanding officer, tax collector, boss, co worker, school professor or teacher, one to one Bible teacher teacher, Pastor, friend, neighbor, anyone.

Write the verses indicating that you should obey them on the same piece of paper where you wrote that you should obey your parents or husband.

Did you answer I should disobey Exodus 20:13-16 or that I should disobey the authority figure because you have to disobey at least one.

Now try to find other prohibitions in the Bible that you think are relevant today and do the same thing all over again substituting those prohibitions for the prohibitions listed above in Questions 1 through 4

When you do this write the Bible verses for the prohibitions on the same sheet that you wrote Exodus 20:13-16 on

I bet you are feeling pretty good about yourself now, all confident that you would not murder anyone.  But it is one thing to say you would not murder anyone and another thing to actually not murder anyone.

Most people would obey the authority figure even those who have never attended UBF that is why our struggle is not against flesh and blood but against authority figures called "rulers" or "principalities" according to Ephesians 6:12 KJV.  

 For we wrestle not against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this world, against spiritual wickedness in high places.

https://www.blueletterbible.org/kjv/eph/6/1/t_conc_1103012

Accessed online on 2018 January 20

Would most people would murder, steal and bear false witness on behalf of a perceived authority figure?

How far “completely normal people” can go in submitting to an authority and following obviously inhuman orders, has also been documented by the social psychologist Stanley Milgram in a famous experiment in the 1960s. He wrote: “I set up a simple experiment to test how much pain an ordinary citizen would inflict on another person simply because he was ordered to by an experimental scientist. Stark authority was pitted against the subjects’ strongest moral imperatives against hurting others, and, with the subjects’ ears ringing with the screams of the victims, authority won more often than not. The extreme willingness of adults to go to almost any lengths on the command of an authority constitutes the chief finding of the study…”

http://ubfriends.net/bonn-ubf-the-subtle-methods-of-mister-chang-and-the-bonn-syndrome/

Accessed online on 2018 January 20

http://web.archive.org/web/20180104023204/http://ubfriends.net/bonn-ubf-the-subtle-methods-of-mister-chang-and-the-bonn-syndrome/

University Bible Fellowship only makes this problem worse by misusing the Bible to teach obedience to authority figures.

Maybe I am wrong and obedience to a husband, wife, brother or sister should take precedence over obedience to the command not to murder?

6 If your very own brother, or your son or daughter, or the wife you love, or your closest friend secretly entices you, saying, “Let us go and worship other gods” (gods that neither you nor your ancestors have known, 7 gods of the peoples around you, whether near or far, from one end of the land to the other), 8 do not yield to them or listen to them. Show them no pity. Do not spare them or shield them. 9 You must certainly put them to death. Your hand must be the first in putting them to death, and then the hands of all the people. 10 Stone them to death, because they tried to turn you away from the Lord your God, who brought you out of Egypt, out of the land of slavery. 11 Then all Israel will hear and be afraid, and no one among you will do such an evil thing again.

Deuteronomy 13:6-11 NIV

https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Deuteronomy+13

Accessed online on 2018 January 20

But my question was about murder not about worshiping other gods but pay attention to what these idol worshipers did.

2 “Say to the Israelites: ‘Any Israelite or any foreigner residing in Israel who sacrifices any of his children to Molek is to be put to death. The members of the community are to stone him. 3 I myself will set my face against him and will cut him off from his people; for by sacrificing his children to Molek, he has defiledmy sanctuary and profaned my holy name. 4 If the members of the community close their eyes when that man sacrifices one of his children to Molek and if they fail to put him to death, 5 I myself will set my face against him and his family and will cut them off from their people together with all who follow him in prostituting themselves to Molek.

Leviticus 20:2-5 NIV

https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=leviticus+20&version=NIV

Accessed online on 2018 January 20

An idol like a Molek statue was just another authority figure used to justify murder much like the orders of a politician are used to imprison people for non violent crime or start wars in other countries or to declare that abortion is not murder because it has been legalized.

I suspect that since the method of idol worship in that place and time was often to murder an innocent person on behalf of an authority figure and not merely to believe another deity exists such as being a modern Hinduist (as opposed to Hinduism during a time when some but not all Hinduists burned widows) the penalty was death as it was for murder in general in the old testament

5 And for your lifeblood I will surely demand an accounting. I will demand an accounting from every animal. And from each human being, too, I will demand an accounting for the life of another human being.

6 “Whoever sheds human blood,
    by humans shall their blood be shed;
for in the image of God
    has God made mankind.

Genesis 9:5-6 NIV

https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=genesis+9&version=NIV

Accessed online 2018 January 20

I am not necessarily advocating the death penalty here in modern times but showing these verses to show the consistency with the rest of the old testament of executing those idol worshippers whose method of idol worship was to murder people who should not be killed

If you have a problem with me talk to me not UBFriends staff

Views expressed do not necessarily represent those of University Bible Fellowship or UBFriends nor other members or ex members of UBF

To UBFriends staff if you need to modify this slightly or greatly  in the version posted on UBFriends to meet the censorship code in order to avoid threats feel free to do so I will retain the original uncensored post here.  If you prefer another means of dealing with controversial material such as me emailing you something then asking permission to post it let me know.  I see nothing here that technically violates the official rules you posted or the other extra rules you emailed me but the implications might really tick people off.  Also I tend to do these in a sleep deprived session in which I feel strongly compelled to write and do not always have it written best the first time.

https://marriagebyfaith.blogspot.com/2018/01/if-you-have-problem-with-me-talk-to-me.html


Complaints about controversial material to UBFriends staff has led me to the decision to relocate most of my material to a separate set of blogs.  Some people have been complaining to and even threatening UBFriends staff but not talking to me because of my material and the material of one other individual who will not be named by me.  Please leave UBFriends staff alone

You can email me at

FellowshipBibleUniversity

At

Gmail

Dot

Com

My blogs are listed, described and indexed at

http://www.improvinguniversitybiblefellowship.blogspot.com

Who really is pro rape here me or UBF?

Articles here do not necessarily represent official UBF teaching or any other UBF member or ex members point of view

Listen to or read a sermon By Pastor Ron Ward, your local UBF Pastor or Chapter director or whatever UBF leader you consider to be the most authoritative who is not in a Reform UBF type of group and count how many times he uses the New International Version and how many times he uses other translations

For more than 100 Sermons and Bible Studies in English with our local Pastor and one to one Bible teachers in my Chapter, that I witnessed personally, they used the New International Version more than 50 percent of the time.  I had the same experience in regional conferences and world conferences in the United States with speakers and Bible teachers.  Not a single one of them departed from using NIV in more than 50% of the Bible Verses of any sermon from which I had access to the manuscripts that I can remember even one time possibly excluding plagiarism of other sources for their sermons that used other translations.

New International Version was the standard

But in Deuteronomy 22 rape is promoted in the New International Version translation which is the UBF standard and I have seen zero articles by current or ex members of UBF opposing this pro rape teaching excluding my own articles

I do not mean any disrespect here to people who are actually doing what they should be doing.  If you have been contacting a third party because a lack of my contact information my email is below.

After I painstakingly explained what is wrong with the pro rape translation of Deuteronomy 22, I have been accused of writing pro rape articles or perhaps of writing the word "rape" in articles

Before accusing me of writing pro rape articles do your own work and explain why the translation your Church endorses is wrong about rape!  Or do you support the pro rape translation?  How many articles have you written about this?  Or is your complaint that I wrote the word, "rape?"  If so then you should start using a translation of the Bible that never uses the word "rape!"

I have seen zero such articles

Do you also have a problem with how I interpreted Deuteronomy 21 then write what you think it means and post a link to your blog or video in the comments below

Since my work is not good enough write your own 

You could address what this self proclaimed atheist said in the video below

Or address how it is wrong for UBF to actually do rape via a third party by deception!  Has anyone else called marriage by faith rape by deception?  If so, post a link to the article your wrote!

http://marriagebyfaith.blogspot.com/2018/01/marriage-by-faith-is-rape-via-third.html

Are you still offended?  Did I miscommunicate something?  Then start writing better articles than me and save me the work of at least trying to do something and still being criticized.  

You will save me the effort of writing I can just post links to your articles if you do a better job than me 

Or could just a few parts be reworded due to typos or a lack of clarity on my part.  Please post a correction of how I could have worded things better or email me at the email below

Do not waste a third parties time complaining about my articles, post a comment in the section below or email me

Or are you trying to censor free speech because you are too much of a intellectual coward to write a response article to me and you just want to shut my articles down so you complain to a third party instead of talking to me directly?

I am not sorry this blog is not an information control cult and those tactics will not work here

Please send hate speech, praise, questions, comments and suggested writing corrections to me at

FellowshipBibleUniversity
at
Gmail
dot
Com

And not to a third party

When Rape is Okay

 

DarkAntics

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pLGiVEshwHY
Accessed online on 2018 January 19
New International Version teaches rape is OK

28 If a man happens to meet a virgin who is not pledged to be married and rapes her and they are discovered, 29 he shall pay her father fifty shekels[c] of silver. He must marry the young woman, for he has violated her. He can never divorce her as long as he lives.
Deuteronomy 22:28-29 NIV

https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Deuteronomy+22&version=NIV

Accessed online on 2018 January 19

I refute the New International Version translation of Deuteronomy 22 below in the section entitled, Prohibition on forced marriage

http://marriagebyfaith.blogspot.com/2018/01/you-can-marry-anyone-who-consents-that.html
Accessed online on 2018 January 19

And I do not necessarily say Deuteronomy 21 teaches rape either

Deuteronomy 21:10-14 might not be a forced marriage alternatively it could mean that they are permitted to marry a captive woman if the captive woman consents to marriage. 

http://marriagebyfaith.blogspot.com/2018/01/you-can-marry-anyone-who-consents-that.html
Accessed online on 2018 January 19

In the American jail system prisoners who are held captive can choose to marry people but are not forced to marry anyone so it is possible in at least some cases to marry a war captive without it being rape.

"Complete any paperwork required by the prison. Many prisons require a packet of paperwork to be completed by both potential spouses before granting permission for the wedding to take place. Check with the warden or other appropriate prison official to learn how to submit your application, if necessary. Some common paperwork requirements include:^[2]

• Proof that both potential spouses are of legal age to marry
• Statements that the marriage is entered into willingly
• Statements regarding the reason the wedding is requested while one potential spouse is incarcerated"

http://web.archive.org/web/20220403215914/https://www.wikihow.com/Marry-Someone-in-Prison

"Get a license. Every state requires potential spouses to obtain a marriage license prior to becoming legally married. This requirement is not waived because one potential spouse is in prison. Contact the warden or other appropriate official of the prison in which the inmate is housed to learn the process for obtaining this license. Often, the non-incarcerated potential spouse will be tasked with this."

http://web.archive.org/web/20220403215914/https://www.wikihow.com/Marry-Someone-in-Prison

https://duckduckgo.com/?q=can+you+marry+a+prisoner&ia=web

The State marriage certificate, how men become slaves to UBF

Articles here do not necessarily represent official UBF teaching or any other UBF member or ex members point of view

Most western and most Eastern women are horrible people who have the potential to be good as are most men.  Most of their bad actions are the result of their faith in authority figures right to rule over other people.  I am going to explain perceived cultural trends that may deceive a man into a State marriage certificate because of the perceived superior nature of foreign women and how in the end signing one of these marriage contracts to get a spouse is not usually worth it for the man, specifically how UBF enslaves men to elders through the threat of their wife divorcing them.

Marriage by faith is rape via a third party

Articles here do not necessarily represent official UBF teaching or any other UBF member or ex members point of view


https://commons.m.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:War_on_the_White_Slave_Trade_01.jpg Picture accessed online 2017 March 26

Imagine if someone threatened you with a gun so you obeyed everything they said.  Later they said you were never coerced because the gun was never loaded.  Imagine if someone verbally threatened to blow up your house if you did not obey everything they said.  Later they said you consented free from a threat of loss because their were no explosives and then later you found out there was no house in the first place!  Marriage by faith is not the same as matchmaking because an element of fraud is added to threaten either punishment from God or a loss of reward from God for not complying.

Rape by deception is a crime in which the perpetrator has the victim's agreement and compliance, but gains it through deception or fraudulent statements or actions.
https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rape_by_deception
Source accessed online 2018 January 17

Now imagine if one person raped another person and you could clarify it was rape because of a loaded gun to the person's head.  But what if the gun was unloaded, surely the threat of imminent danger would only be imagined, one might even argue it was not rape because no real threat of physical harm was presented the victim only imagined a danger.  Would you accept such an argument in court as a juror?

Now when a man married a woman by faith he is not raping her because he himself was threatened nor is the woman raping the man for she herself was threatened.

I am calling it rape via a third party because the Pastor is coercing them to get married through a fraudulent threat, and he knows they will have sex so he is forcing two other people to have sex with each other against both of their wills even though he just watches them get married knowing what is about to happen.

Married couples too busy fishing to multiply

Views expressed do not necessarily represent University Bible Fellowship nor UBFriends

http://ubfriends.net/married-couples-to-busy-fishing-to-multiply/

http://ubfriends.net/married-couples-to-busy-fishing-to-multiply/

Married couples too busy fishing to multiply

At my chapter less than 1 new disciple per year that stayed in UBF has been produced per married couple on average.  On the other hand a human female is capable of producing almost one child per year from 18 to 30.  Fishing can not be justified as a substitute for multiplying if UBF is truly serious  about maximizing the number of disciples produced.  Discipleship ministry is a farce.

Fishing plus multiplying could be justified but in a conference I overheard one of the people give testimony that their Bible teacher ordered them not to have any more children so they can focus more on raising bible students, if their rates were anything like my chapter was that was a complete farce.  I am not spreading unsubstantiated rumors without eye witnesses hundreds of people or more heard the testimony at the conference.  The word multiply means breed not fish.

How secret bigamy in Africa UBF disproves marriage by faith

Views expressed do not necessarily represent University Bible Fellowship nor UBFriends

The following article was taken down from UBFriends perhaps they misunderstood my title and my point.  UBF Bible teachers claiming to have been led by God appointed a married man a second wife.  If God forbids polygyny but they said this marriage was appointed by God that means sometimes the Bible teachers are not being led by God when they do matchmaking undermining their teaching but it God does not forbid polygyny than their marriage by faith doctrine is also a falsehood because they teach that in the new testament time period polygyny is a win unless I am wrong about that, if I am wrong UBF can put out an official statement that polygyny is not always a sin in modern times and prove me reasoning wrong.  The purpose of my article was not about monogamy or polygamy but another disproof of marriage by faith.  You might believe such an event never occurred and you should not take my word for it just hang around with UBF members in good standing long enough and you will hear incidents on your own providing evidence to you personally that UBF matchmakers sometimes make mistakes disproving the marriage by faith doctrine.

Below is the article the original title is "You can't have marriage by faith without God appointed polygyny"

http://ubfriends.net/you-cant-have-marriage-by-faith-without-god-appointed-polygyny/

http://ubfriends.net/you-cant-have-marriage-by-faith-without-god-appointed-polygyny/

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Harem#/media/File%3A4_New_entrant_to_a_princes_harem._Jaipur%2C_late_18_century%2C_National_Museum_New_Delhi_(2).jpg
Image accessed online 2017 March 31

One of the people in Africa UBF married by faith.  That means an all knowing God personally appointed through divine revelation to those given divine authority that he specifically should marry the exact woman he did and that not to marry her would be to disobey God and that to marry her would be to obey God.  This all knowing God knew he already was married before he married his second wife.  If marriage by faith is THE TRUTH then God approves of polygyny there is no other possibility.

Marriage by faith, surprise it still exists

Articles here do not necessarily represent official UBF teaching or any other UBF member or ex members point of view

When I left UBF I was encouraged to date to find someone by UBF leaders who tried to scare people away from dating when I was in better standing.  There are three kinds of people 1st class UBF members in good standing, 2nd class regular Christians and 3rd class unbelievers.

I was demoted to second class and when I talked to them occasionally while not attending their regular meetings they were insistent I date a second class person like myself never a first or third class.

They actually ironically were opposed to me having my friends outside UBF match me with foreigners, I should date Christians only and Christians not in UBF, foreigner mail order brides should be avoided as I might marry a non Christian.I

 I should do dating definitely dating and of Christians only, plans to use a matchmaker outside of UBF or online dating sites to get a mail order bride when mentioned made the Pastors wife freak out in our brief conversation.

But I was loyal to UBF doctrine even upon leaving UBF I did not want to date anyone before marriage there was no other way.  They wanted me to be fickle on the doctrine once I left and date people don't use a matchmaker or get a mail order bride.

Furthermore at least one of the Pastors children was permitted to date people.

Clearly matchmaking had become optional and dating was allowed


Surprise!

Except I found out people left because suddenly the Pastor acted bizarre when a student got a girlfriend even though they just started allowing people to date.

The Pastor never reformed I just became a second class Christian so I thought people were allowed to date but no years later they are still abusing first class Christians and the second class Christians can not see it because they do not get special favors.

When we leave UBF we may think the abuses practiced are gone but they are still ongoing and disturbingly UBF leaders know matchmaking can turn out badly they were afraid it could ruin my life more than the evils of dating at least if anyone else does the matchmaking.

You can marry anyone who consents that is not forbidden. Say no to ink blot prayers.

Articles here do not necessarily represent official UBF teaching or any other UBF member or ex members point of view

By focusing on historical narratives in the Bible when it comes to marriage members of University Bible Fellowship treat the Bible like a ink blot when it comes to who someone is allowed or forbidden to marry who according to God.  I will instead actually focus on verses that explicitly talk about marriage rules in the Bible.  In many of these verses I will point out that either the man or woman is allowed by God himself to marry anyone they want to who consents and is not forbidden from marriage by another rule if every word of the Bible is inspired by God as UBF Bible teachers claim to believe.

This means that if a Bible teacher says you or someone else on your behalf needs to pray about marrying someone to know if it is God's will they are deceiving you because God already explicitly said you are allowed to marry them unless there is a specific verse or moral principle condemning such a marriage, such a moral principle would not be secret knowledge God has hidden from you but given to your Bible teacher through revelation.  The Bible teachers have historically used prayer as an excuse to encourage or prevent marriage, while bypassing the proper intention of prayer obedience to the moral principles God already taught that would allow the Bible student to make their own choice.  I am not telling people not to pray but prayer is not necessary to determine whether or not it is a transgression of the written commands to marry someone.

Prohibition on forced marriage

First with only two possible exceptions in Deuteronomy 21:10-14 and Deuteronomy 22:28-29, the prohibition on kidnapping in Exodus 21:16 and Deuteronomy 24:7, the prohibition on returning a servant to his/her master in Deuteronomy 23:15-16 and the allowance for divorce in Exodus 21:10-11 and possibly elsewhere forbid forcing a man to marry a woman without her consent or a woman to marry a man without his consent.

The prohibition of kidnapping could apply to kidnapping someone who is a man or a woman not necessarily a man only, since masculine nouns in Hebrew can apply to either men or women not men only, much like the word "he" can apply to a woman if the gender of the person is unknown in English.

Sexless marriage is an allowance for divorce in Exodus 21:10-11 and the man is not permitted to force the woman to have sex with him nor is the woman allowed to force the man to have sex with her because in order to have sex they must be in close proximity but neither one is allowed to force the other person to be in close proximity because kidnapping was a death penalty offense in the old testament (it is also forbidden in the new testament in 1 Timothy 1:10 although no death penalty is listed there.)

Since forced sex is not permissible and any marriage in which sex is discontinued is grounds for divorce even if such a marriage could be forced in name it could be terminated through sex refusal, but it would be very ridiculous to continually declare people married to other people when one of the members of the marriage refuses to sexually consummate it and declares themself either divorced from or not currently married to or never married to that person every time either a third party or the other person proclaims they are married to that person

Deuteronomy 22:28-29 is incorrectly translated as rape in the current New International Version, however other translations such as the Contemporary English Version indicate that it maybe consensual sex.  The Hebrew could include consensual and or non consensual sex according to different translators however there is the death penalty in non consensual sex since it involves kidnapping therefore the forced marriage in Deuteronomy 22:28-29 is not in response to rape but to consensual sex.  Deuteronomy 22 might have resulted in forced marriage but only forced marriage for individuals who chose to have sex, and those individuals knowing that rule should not have chosen to have sex if they did not want to get married, so in a sense knowing the rule they chose the consequence of forced marriage by having sex in that society in that period of time.

The other possible case in which forced marriage might have occurred is Deuteronomy 21:10-14 if this was a forced marriage it would have been a forced marriage of a war captive.  This may seem like it is a violation of human rights but alternatively they could have executed the war captive to prevent the war captive from killing them since they were from the hostile enemy side.  Deuteronomy 21:10-14 might not be a forced marriage alternatively it could mean that they are permitted to marry a captive woman if the captive woman consents to marriage.  If the war captive is given a choice between being a unmarried prisoner and being a prisoner who is married to a specific person then such a marriage could be consensual even if the captivity was not consensual.  Even in the United States today prisoners held in captivity in prisons are sometimes permitted to marry people living outside of prison if both people are legally considered to have consented to it.  These war captives would likely not have been Jewish so this might have been an interfaith marriage contrary to University Bible Fellowship dogma prohibiting interfaith marriages.

You can marry who you choose if there is not a rule forbidding it

Exodus 21:7-11 permits choice of marriage partner for the man

Exodus 21:8
New International Version
If she does not please the master who has selected her for himself, he must let her be redeemed. He has no right to sell her to foreigners, because he has broken faith with her.
Holman Christian Standard Bible
If she is displeasing to her master, who chose her for himself, then he must let her be redeemed. He has no right to sell her to foreigners because he has acted treacherously toward her. 
English Standard Version
If she does not please her master, who has designated her for himself, then he shall let her be redeemed. He shall have no right to sell her to a foreign people, since he has broken faith with her.
http://biblehub.com/exodus/21-8.htm

The context of this verse allows the person to chose, select or designate the woman he wants to marry for himself, no requirement of a third party praying to decide if it is God's will, God merely allows the man to choose to marry her.  Read Exodus 21:7-11 to get the overall context because Exodus 21:1-6 is talking about something different.

Exodus 21:1-6 Should be studied for a complete understanding of all the ways to get married according to the Bible but is not necessary to convey the main points I am explaining and I have chosen to omit further details on it because people may argue over the ambiguity of the marital status of the woman in the case where the man would choose to discontinue working for his master in such a way as to distract from the main points of this article.

Deuteronomy 24:1-4 permits a divorced woman to marry a new man of her choice

American Standard Version
And when she is departed out of his house, she may go and be another man's wife .
King James Bible
And when she is departed out of his house, she may go and be another man's wife.
New Living Translation
When she leaves his house, she is free to marry another man.
Deuteronomy 24;2
http://biblehub.com/deuteronomy/24-2.htm

The Bible says that she may marry another man, not she may marry another man if the man is the one the Bible teacher said is the correct one in response to prayer and not a man the Bible teacher said is wrong in response to prayer.

1 Corinthians 7:39, 1 Timothy 5:14 and Romans 7:3 allow a unmarried widow to marry

Berean Literal Bible
Therefore I want the younger ones to marry, to bear children, to manage their households, to give the one opposing no occasion on account of reproach.

1 Timothy 5:14
http://biblehub.com/1_timothy/5-14.htm

New International Version
A woman is bound to her husband as long as he lives. But if her husband dies, she is free to marry anyone she wishes, but he must belong to the Lord.
1 Corinthians 7:39
http://biblehub.com/1_corinthians/7-39.htm

Holman Christian Standard Bible
So then, if she gives herself to another man while her husband is living, she will be called an adulteress. But if her husband dies, she is free from that law. Then, if she gives herself to another man, she is not an adulteress. 
Romans 7:3
http://biblehub.com/romans/7-3.htm


In Timothy 5 widows under 60 years old are encouraged to remarry, it does not say encouraged to remarry unless you want to marry someone other than the person your Bible teacher suggests.

In Romans 7 If a unmarried widow marries a man after her husband dies she is not an adulteress.  It does not say she is not an adultress unless the Bible teacher has failed to confirm she should marry that man in prayer.

In 1 Corinthians 7:39 there is no vagueness that the woman can choose any consenting man she wants who is not forbidden by rules elsewhere as it says, "she is free to marry anyone she wishes" it does not say she has to pray to decide, if she wishes to marry a man she is permitted if no rule elsewhere forbids it.

A man can opt out of the marriage in Deuteronomy 25 or choose to engage in it given the opportunity and the woman can opt out as described above

5 If brothers are living together and one of them dies without a son, his widow must not marry outside the family. Her husband’s brother shall take her and marry her and fulfill the duty of a brother-in-law to her. 6 The first son she bears shall carry on the name of the dead brother so that his name will not be blotted out from Israel.

7 However, if a man does not want to marry his brother’s wife, she shall go to the elders at the town gate and say, “My husband’s brother refuses to carry on his brother’s name in Israel. He will not fulfill the duty of a brother-in-law to me.” 8 Then the elders of his town shall summon him and talk to him. If he persists in saying, “I do not want to marry her,” 9 his brother’s widow shall go up to him in the presence of the elders, take off one of his sandals, spit in his face and say, “This is what is done to the man who will not build up his brother’s family line.” 10 That man’s line shall be known in Israel as The Family of the Unsandaled.

Deuteronomy 25:5-10 NIV

https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Deuteronomy+25

The requirements for inheriting a deceased brother's widow as a future wife were very specific he must be living together (verse 5) with his brother then when his brother dies he can choose to marry his brother's wife if he wants.  In verse 8 and 9 the man is permitted to refuse to marry the widow he inherited as a potential future wife upon his brothers death.  Although it is not stated in Deuteronomy 25:5-10 that I see the woman can refuse to marry him or nullify the marriage as I said she can with any marriage (with two possible exceptions in Deuteronomy 22 and Deuteronomy 21) earlier.

1 Corinthians 7:8-9 says let them marry

8Now to the unmarried and widows I say this: It is good for them to remain unmarried, as I am. 9But if they cannot control themselves, let them marry. For it is better to marry than to burn with passion.

1 Corintians 7:8-9 Berean Study Bible

http://biblehub.com/bsb/1_corinthians/7.htm

It does not say let them marry only if the Bible teacher prayed about it and determined they were the couple ordained to be paired by God.

Forbidden marriages that are not permitted 

Leviticus 18, Leviticus 20, Romans 1 and 1 Timothy 1 forbid a man from having homosexual sex with another man so it is forbidden for two men to marry each other.  

It is also forbidden in Deuteronomy 22, Leviticus 18 and Leviticus 20 for a married woman to have sex with another man then her husband thereby forbidding a woman from marrying another man if she is still married and Romans 7:3 also forbids a married woman from marrying an additional man other then her current husband.  

Bestiality is also forbidden in Leviticus 18 and Leviticus 20 and humans should only marry humans.